Franzen grew up nerdy and nervous in a small, comfortable town in Missouri called Webster Groves. Here are a few things that young Jonathan was afraid of, according to The Discomfort Zone: “spiders, insomnia, fish hooks, school dances, hardball, heights, bees, urinals, puberty, music teachers, dogs, the school cafeteria, censure, older teenagers, jellyfish, locker rooms, boomerangs, popular girls,” and most of all, “my parents.” When he wasn’t afraid, Franzen was embarrassed. Here’s another list citing reasons why the boy Franzen wasn’t popular. “I had a large vocabulary, a giddily squeaking voice, horn-rimmed glasses, poor arm strength, too-obvious approval from my teachers, irresistible urges to shout unfunny puns, a near eidetic acquaintance with J.R.R. Tolkien, a big chemistry lab in my basement, a penchant for intimately insulting any unfamiliar girl unwise enough to speak to me, and so on.”
