Carrie: I have a 9-month-old that wakes up quite frequently at night (will usually go back to sleep after a bottle, but will still wake an hour later). I’ve tried sleep training several times, but I now realize that I haven’t been consistent and that is why the plan has failed. I’m at the end of my rope and so I’ve made up my mind that something needs to been done and quick (before I lose my sanity). My question is what to do if my baby throws up during a crying spell? I usually pick him up, get everything cleaned up and then convince myself that this night was a failure and that I should start again another night. I’m also confused as to whether to use the “cold turkey” approach or the “gradual” approach. He does seem to get very upset if I enter the room and then leave again. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
Sally Tannen: Carrie: You are right. Consistency is the key to success! Your 9-month-old will cry that much harder if he knows you’ll give in eventually. Do you give him a bottle every time he wakes up? I think you may want ask your pediatrician if you can give up the middle-of-the-night bottles. If he says yes, which I think he will, then you can concentrate on how to help him fall back to sleep. And while he’s still upset, he’ll have less to throw up. If you don’t want to go in to the room all the time, you and your partner (if you have one) need to come up with a plan that you can both follow.
When you go into the baby’s room, keep the lights off, speak very softly and reassure him that you’re there. Clean him up if necessary, rub his back and go out again, but come back in two minutes, then 3 then 4… Hopefully it won’t take more than a few days.
Sally Tannen
Director, 92nd Street Y Parenting Center