Our Ask the Parenting Center Q&A series has generated a lot of questions from parents about their child’s sleeping and eating habits, but sometimes the questions are much more difficult—especially when they touch upon things like separation, illness and death, sex, starting school, moving, divorce, war and terrorism. The question below from 92Y Blog reader Alice is one example, and is exactly the kind of question our Wonderplay experts will be addressing tomorrow night at a special event for parents, What Do I Say to My Children?

Alice: What do I tell my 4-year-old about the fact that his grandfather is dying in the hospital? Should I take him to see his grandpa to say goodbye?

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Sally Tannen: Hi Alice. These are some of the things to think about as you and your partner decide what to tell your 4-year-old:

What is the relationship between your child and your dad? Do they see each other often? What will he see if he goes to the hospital? Does your father look very different? Is he hooked up to a lot of machines? Does your father want him to visit? Think about your child’s temperament. Is he a worrier? Resilient? Don’t feel you need to give him a lot of information. Follow his lead and answer the questions he asks of you over time.

Sally Tannen
Director, 92nd Street Y Parenting Center

Have a parenting question of your own? Email it to us or leave it in the comments. And come meet all the Wonderplay experts at our event tomorrow night.

[What Do I Say to My Children?]